Most of us would like to be better people, whether at home, at the office or anywhere else. The problem is knowing exactly where to start.
You become a better person by working more on yourself. Motivation is very important here. People change when they really want to, so it’s important to find some motivation for change, whether that’s feeling better about yourself, feeling better about others, projecting a better image of yourself or growing as a person.
Here are some of the things that John Rampton has collected in The Muse, which you can add to your daily routine to become a better person.
1. Think before you speak
Before you set your tongue in motion, put your brain to work. Some words can be hurtful. And at other times, depending on how you say things, they can be misunderstood and end up hurting. Have you ever said something as a joke and then realised it was inappropriate? You probably felt pretty bad afterwards.
So always take a few extra seconds to think about the impact of your words before you say them out loud.
2. Embrace change
Change helps us grow as individuals. Instead of resisting change, be open to trying new things, even if they scare you.
As well as accepting change, you should also champion positive change. Since we have the chance to change, it’s better to choose change for the better.
3. Be grateful
As the Spanish saying goes, “gratitude is the mark of a good upbringing.” Besides being good for the people around us, gratitude is a powerful tool for feeling good about ourselves.
According to research, people who feel grateful are more optimistic and feel better about their lives. What’s more, grateful people feel less envy towards those who have more than they do, are more willing to help others and may be able to prevent health problems, including heart disease. Gratitude also boosts self-esteem and reduces stress.
4. Look after your social circles
I don’t mean spending all day on Facebook, but keeping in touch with our friends, family, neighbours and co-workers. Good friends need looking after so we don’t lose them, and the power of friendship to spread happiness around us is well known. You may think you only need your partner, your parents and the odd friend to be happy, but the truth is that selfishness and neglect in matters of friendship can cost you dearly. Of course, it’s better to have a few good friends than many.
5. Use your strengths and work on your weaknesses
Our strengths are our greatest asset, so we should use them to get what we want. We should make the most of them.
At the same time, you also need to be aware of your weaknesses. It’s another way to grow as a person. Take some time to make a list of your weak points and set goals to work on them.
But remember that it’s much more important to focus on your strengths than to try to fix your flaws. People who try to improve their weaknesses often end up frustrated. I recommend reading our article “Don’t focus on fixing your flaws; focus on building up your strengths”.
6. Take care of yourself
Exercise. Eat healthily. Get enough sleep. You’ve heard this advice a thousand times before. But looking after yourself is one of the best ways to make yourself a better person. For example, how can you go out and play with your children if you always feel tired? How can you be more productive at work when you’re exhausted? Not only will you be happier and more productive, but your loved ones and co-workers will thank you for it too.
7. Help others
Numerous studies have shown that helping others is directly linked to well-being, health, longevity and success. Acts of kindness make us feel better about ourselves, and the positive emotions they generate give us a greater capacity for physical and psychological recovery. So help an elderly neighbour with their shopping bags, hold the door open for others, listen to a friend whose relationship has just ended, and so on.
But be careful: don’t confuse helping with wasting your time on toxic people.
8. Be curious
A study reported by The Huffington Post found that curiosity can help strengthen relationships, keep your brain stimulated, reduce anxiety, keep you happy and help you learn, even about dull subjects.
Great advances come from curiosity. In fact, curiosity is one of the traits of highly intelligent people.
9. Don’t be impatient
When you’re not calm, things can seem more serious than they really are, and you may also make decisions you later regret. By being patient, you’ll not only make better decisions but also feel better about yourself every day.
Impatience also often causes a lot of stress. Some things simply take time. For example, a baby takes nine months to be born; in the same way, whether we’re talking about building wealth or growing a business, it takes time, and impatience can only lead you to make bad decisions.
10. Stop pointing the finger
“When you point a finger at someone, three fingers are pointing back at you.” We all face obstacles in life, but you can’t use them as an excuse not to grow as a person.
As author and motivational speaker Jack Canfield puts it, remember that you, and only you, are responsible for maintaining your energy: give up blaming, complaining and indecision, and keep taking the actions that will lead you to your dream goals.
See also: The surprising truth about happiness
Featured image: Eiku, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons.
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